Latest World Headlines

If I can forgive Bill, then you can forgive each other, Hilary tells Israel and Palestine

US Secretary of State Hilary Clinton has begun Middle East peace talks by telling Israel and Palestine that if she is capable of forgiving Bill Clinton for having sex with an intern, then they are surely capable of forgiving each other’s past indiscretions.

Obama hails end to Iraqi combat operations, what do you think?

“I think it’s lovely. It’s about time that ordinary Iraqi’s took control of accidentally killing their own civilians.”

Chilean miners happy to stay underground until ‘X Factor is over’

The 33 miners trapped underground in Chile have asked rescue workers to take their time digging them out as they are in no hurry to return to the surface whilst the current series of the X Factor is ongoing.

Iran unveils the Ambassador of death, what do you think?

“I don’t see any reason to be overly concerned. I grew up on a street with an Ambassador of Death, and he hardly ever killed anyone.”

Growing number of Americans worried they might be Muslim

As a new survey showed that over a third of Republican Americans believe President Obama to be a Muslim, many have admitted that they are worried a lax Democrat approach to homeland security might mean that they too, are now Muslim.

Australia to become republic when Queen dies, what do you think?

Australia should become a republic when Queen Elizabeth II dies, Prime Minister Julia Gillard has said just days ahead of the Australian general election, what do you think?

Of course I’m a commercial fisherman, claims everyone in Louisiana

BP last night suggested there may be a few fraudulent claims to their $20bn compensation fund, after every man woman and child in Louisiana claimed to be a commercial fisherman affected by the Mexican gulf oil spill.

Ahmadinejad recovering well from attack that definitely didn’t happen

Iran last night angrily denied there was an assassination attempt on president Ahmadinejad, laying the blame for an attack that definitely didn’t happen squarely at the feet of Western imperialists.

Arabian authorities approve new Blackberry ‘String’ device

Following their move to disable email, the Internet and instant messaging among Blackberry users, Arabian authorities have been quick to approve the firms latest device communication device, the Blackberry String.

Effigy makers welcome Cameron’s Pakistan terrorism comments

Pakistan’s traditional effigy makers have given British Prime Minister David Cameron the thumbs up today, after his allegations that the country was actively promoting the export of terrorism saw a huge upsurge in sales.

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KEITH LEMON

Latest World Headlines

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