Latest Magazine Headlines

Website left completely unprepared for mild popularity attack

Semi-popular news satire site, NewsArse, was taken off the Internet last night after its owners were left completely bemused by its apparently growing popularity.

WeekArse Issue 3

WeekArse magazine returns by popular demand, with this week’s issue containing the following articles.
Slough
And 50 other places to avoid before dying.
Homosexuality
Do two gay wrongs make a gay right?
God’s Work
It’s got his name on it, so it’s his to sort out, surely?
Black Presidents who aren’t dictators
We scour the globe in search of one.

WeekArse issue 2

Weekarse magazine returns this week with more features that could, quite possibly, rock your world!
Next week, the special commemorative Jade Goody issue!

WeekArse Magazine - Issue 1

NewsArse.com is delighted to announce the debut release of it’s sister publication, WeekArse magazine.
The weekly magazine will cover Art, Music, Culture and Lifestyle and will be available right here every weekend until the publishers get a bit bored of doing it.

Murderers unhappy at ‘joke’

Murderers at Belmarsh prison are said to be unhappy at the growing popularity of a joke told at fifteen-year anniversary parties.
The joke, which likens being married to being incarcerated, implies that the husband would have served less time had he killed his wife instead of marrying her.
It’s popularity has grown in recent times as the [...]

Woman accepts initial explanation

A Luton woman has reacted calmly to her husband’s explanation for his late return home from a ‘night out’.
The woman, a 28 year-old primary school teacher, failed to react when her husband explained his late return was due to a long-term friend needing to ‘talk’.
“I was a bit confused, to be honest” said the man, [...]

Beckham: Massive tool, or harmless retard?

David Beckham has captured the imagination of the country for over a decade, but today we ask, “Is he just a massive tool? Or is he merely a harmless retard?”
Beckham, 34, who shot to fame in the mid-nineties after wearing women’s clothing in public, maintained his early high profile with a string of outrageous haircuts.
But [...]

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