Pro-choice Super Bowl advert to show woman’s extremely disappointing son

Following controversy over an anti-abortion advert featuring the mother of American football star Tim Tebow, a pro-choice advert is to be be run in next year’s Super Bowl in which a mother rues her decision to go to term with her extremely disappointing 25 year-old son.

The anti-abortion advert from Colorado-based evangelical Christian organisation ‘Focus on the Family’ showed how Pam Tebow was advised to have an abortion on medical grounds, but ignored the advice and had Tim Tebow, a future star of the NFL.

Mrs Tebow told reporters, “I was advised on medical grounds to terminate, but I didn’t because of God and stuff, and look at me now, the mother of a genuine college football star!”

“I guess what I’m subtly trying to say is that you shouldn’t terminate a foetus because one day it might grow up and be really successful and make you really rich and famous.”

Pro-choice

The campaign has led to plans for a counter-advert from pro-choice organisations who have their own mother figure to front their campaign, in 42 year old Janine Krantz.

Mrs Krantz said she had seen the Tebow advert, but felt that it didn’t reflect reality.

“Having a football star is all well and good, but I decided to keep my child and frankly, he’s been a huge disappointment.”

“He’ll add nothing at all to the human race, he doesn’t excel at sports, he’ll never be an academic, in fact, he rarely gets off the sofa or switches off his Xbox.”

“He’s on welfare, didn’t graduate from High School and is still living at home aged 25 - short of being a criminal, he’s as disappointing as he can be.”

“I often wonder how good my life would have been if I hadn’t had him, and I conclude that it would have been much, much, better.”

“To be fair, the doctors did warn me against keeping him, this wasn’t medical advice, they just suggested that by looking at his genetic donors it was highly likely he’d never amount to anything and would be a drain on me his entire life.”

“And you know what? They were right.”