logo


NEWSARSE ARCHIVES



Authors



News from February 2010

Teenage boys delighted with current levels of media sexualisation

Teenage boys delighted with current levels of media sexualisation thumbnail

The nation’s teenage boys have responded to a report claiming that there is an over-sexualisation of today’s children by stating that they are perfectly happy with the current levels of sexual imagery, thank you very much.


Fans panic as Bridge retirement puts Neville one place closer to recall

Fans panic as Bridge retirement puts Neville one place closer to recall thumbnail

England supporters were last night panicking after Wayne Bridge’s international retirement moved Phil Neville up one place in the pecking order for a left-back berth at the World Cup.


Tragedy as killer whale does exactly what it says on the tin

Tragedy as killer whale does exactly what it says on the tin thumbnail

A trainer at the SeaWorld park in Orlando, Florida, has died after her colleagues finally discovered why the animal she worked with is called a ‘killer whale’.


Men everywhere dusting off old Cheryl Cole fantasies

Men everywhere dusting off old Cheryl Cole fantasies thumbnail

Deluded men across the nation were this morning dusting off their old Cheryl Cole fantasies after news broke that she is back on the fictional market, and hypothetically looking for a new lover.


India arrests Britons for having embarrassingly dull hobby

India arrests Britons for having embarrassingly dull hobby thumbnail

Two Britons were arrested in India yesterday after admitting that they like to spend their spare time watching aeroplanes from afar and excitedly noting their tail numbers in a series of battered notebooks.


Latest opinion polls show drop in support for opinion polls

Latest opinion polls show drop in support for opinion polls thumbnail

The latest series of opinion polls released today show a significant fall in the popularity of opinion polls, with support for opinion polls down 7% on a series of opinion polls taken just minutes earlier.


Anger as adult app removal makes masturbating to an iPhone more difficult

Anger as adult app removal makes masturbating to an iPhone more difficult thumbnail

iPhone application developers have expressed anger at Apple’s decision to ban some adult-themed applications from its iPhone, as it prevents their customers from masturbating with the freedom previously offered by the hand-held device.


Faith schools to teach how sex is much better when you involve God

Faith schools to teach how sex is much better when you involve God thumbnail

Ministers are accused of caving into religious organisations and allowing faith schools to teach sex education however they like, including an explanation of how sex is really much better if you involve God.


Tiger Woods wins Best Actor Bafta for his portrayal of ‘remorseful man’

Tiger Woods wins Best Actor Bafta for his portrayal of ‘remorseful man’ thumbnail

Tiger Woods was a surprise winner at last night’s Baftas, picking up the Best Actor award for his portrayal of a remorseful professional athlete in the Internet sensation, “Tiger Woods says sorry for all the shagging around and that”.


Bogwashing ‘absolutely rife’ at Number 10, claims Downing Street insider

Bogwashing ‘absolutely rife’ at Number 10, claims Downing Street insider thumbnail

A former office worker at Number 10 Downing Street has revealed the full extent of the bullying that took place during his time there, including his own regular ‘bogwashes’ at the hands of the Prime Minister Gordon Brown.


Next Page »





SPANK ME


KEITH LEMON



LATEST NEWS HEADLINES

ALSO IN THE NEWS

If you need to use a train then it’s ‘peak time’, clarify rail firms thumbnail If you need to use a train then it’s ‘peak time’, clarify rail firms

Responding to claims that their peak-fare rules are unfair and confusing, train companies have explained that peak time is limited only to the times at which you want to use a train.

MORE STORIES

Survey finds public wants cold-callers banned, what do you think? thumbnail Survey finds public wants cold-callers banned, what do you think?

HAVE YOUR SAY

HAVE YOUR SAY Is Man Utd goal scorer Own Goal really worth £85m to Real Madrid?

HOMEOPATHY FINALLY PROVEN TO WORK

HOMEOPATHY FINALLY PROVEN TO WORK “This is the proof that that everyone is asking for. They took the sleeping pills, and just a day and half later they simply could not stay awake any longer.”

OK, THESE MIGHT NOT BE HEADLINES ANY MORE

RSS feed Subscribe to our feed       Delicious Are we delicious?       Digg Add us to Digg       Technorati Bookmark us       Twitter Follow us on Twitter